Is Being Friend With Your Ex a Good Idea?
There are no hard and fast rules about staying friends with your ex. Every relationship is different, so whether you stay friends after a break-up depends upon your personal circumstances. The most important thing to consider is what your main motivation is for wanting to stay in touch. If the relationship involves children, then an amicable break-up is always advisable. For the sake of the children, you must remain civil, regardless of the reason for your break-up.
Why Do You Want to Be Friends?
Sometimes, a relationship is based upon a chemistry that goes far beyond being just romantic. Having joint interest and sharing the same group of friends two of the main things that make people want to remain friends after a break-up. Ex-partners can also be useful confidantes and relationship consultants because you can learn from the mistakes you made when you were together.
The Downside of Maintaining a Friendship
For some people, staying friends with an ex can be seen as not wanting to let go and move on. If this is the case, you must figure out why you’re unable to release yourself from your past. The difficulty of moving on stems from the fact that many people don’t believe that they’ll be able to find love again. Another major reason for not wanting to let go of the past is because they don’t want to see their ex-partner move on with someone new; strangely enough, this remains to be the case for people who don’t even want to pursue a relationship with their ex.
If you can honestly say that both you and your ex are over each other, staying friends can be a pleasant experience. However, if either one of you is hoping that this new-found friendship will evolve into something else, the friendship will be doomed to fail. If there’s one person within a friendship that harbours romantic feelings for the other it’s bound to interfere with future relationships. Not only will the one who’s still in love with their ex make things difficult for the other to move on, the chance of them having an affair at some point in the future increases greatly. This tends to happen if the one who tried to move on hits a rocky patch in their new relationship. It’s much easier to fall into old habits with someone you have a history with, especially if it was a sexual one.
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